Remember that scene from Bruce Almighty, when Bruce is standing in a lightning storm and he metaphorically speaking throws down the gauntlet – yelling, “Smite me, oh Mighty Smiter!”, ready to just have it out with God once and for all?
I so wish there was a YouTube clip of it that I could post here. There isn’t one.
That was my day at Whitewater.
My kids were in their glory. I sat in the sweltering shade and chatted with Ashley.
I’m telling you – I have a new respect for parents who drop their kids off at public places. I used to look down my nose at how irresponsible it was to allow your children to be unsupervised. Now? I gotta’ give them some credit. They want their kids to have a fun time, but they don’t want anything to do with it.
Is it a great idea? Probably not so much. But I do have a new appreciation for their reasoning.
We were there for a little over an hour before having lunch. Unfortunately, as soon as the kids went back into the water, there was lightning.
And the park closed.
We waited the required sixty minutes in the rain before the park would issue rain checks – not because I particularly want to go back, but because my kids were devastated.
Now, I’m not cheap. I part with money pretty easily (just ask Spin). I’d have been happy to cut my losses and call it a day – but the kids? Notsomuch.
Yah. We’re going back.
But wait. Not all was lost. I may not have been able to collect on the Mother of the Year thing today, but I’m pretty sure I clinched the Most Irresponsible Parent of the Year title with ease.
Stink is sick.
I knowingly took my feverish child to a public amusement park.
We were leaving Subway with lunch for seven people. We were on our way to the waterpark when he said for about the fifth time – “I’m so tired. And I’m so sore. I slept funny on my neck.”, it occurred to me – oh no, he’s sick.
But if he’d had a fever I would have noticed when I put sunscreen all over him. Right?
Wrong. He was burning up. And he was ANGRY – because there was no way – no how – he was going to let anything stop him from getting to the waterpark. He was so close, you see…… mere minutes, in fact.
I did what any irresponsible parent would do. Gave him Motrin and a bottle of water and hissed, “Don’t tell anyone you’re sick.” Again, not because I particularly wanted to go to Whitewater, but because I was so close to having it over with.
God is mocking me, y’all. He is smiting me. I know He is.
“Oh really, Soliloquy? You’ll take your kids to the waterpark once? Bwah hah hah hah!!!”
Maybe Spin will take them back for me. Lord knows it’s his job anyway. I told him this morning (from 1500 miles away) it was all his fault.
He was incredulous. “My fault? How am I in trouble for this?”
“You’re the fun parent.”, I reasoned. “This is your job. But since you also happen to be the absent parent, I am sacrificially filling what would otherwise be a void in our children’s lives.”
He shot back (a little too quickly), “Let’s not forget I also happen to be the paying parent. Sometimes we all have to pinch hit for the sake of the team.”
Yes, well. I did my best.
Once.
Batter up, Spin.
{ 25 comments… read them below or add one }
Oh. Wow. Well.
I will admit I’ve told my daughter not to tell anyone about her rash.
Oh boy- that God…he has a heck of sense of humor doesn’t he? I don’t think it was him getting back at you so much…I think your son was just praying REAL hard that he could come back when he wasn’t ya know, near deathly ill. Thats all I am saying…:)
LOL. I have the same feeling…we live mere minutes from the famed “Sesame Place” and my children ahve never been there. Maybe if I lost a few pounds…well, really, probably not. Love the photo…limitless humanity in warm water…yuck, eeew, blech. Good luck on the next pinch hit.
Pax. E
Elizabeths last blog post..Ouch….
way to take one for the team. twice.
aleces last blog post..girlfriends with semi-colons
I hope he’s feeling better!
Annabelle@Christian Mommas last blog post..Thankful Thursday
Oh yes the fun parent should ALWAYS be the one to head up those kind of adventures!
Next time he goes to the park while you go to the spa! Only fair!
Deannas last blog post..1 Down. 179 To Go.
You are SOOO funny and I can so empathize!!! I just don’t though. I don’t go out to the parks when it’s this hot, I don’t do much at all in late July/early August. You are to be commended. Well…maybe not for the fever thing…but who’s counting!!! We’re behind you sister!!!
Maybe you should see if you can get traded to another team….
Kelly @ Love Wells last blog post..Confessions of a Sometimes Scrapbooker
If I hadn’t recently had surgery, I would SOOOOOOOO take your kids for you. Not sure why God hasn’t let me grow up, but I still love water parks and amusement parks. I thought I’d gotten enough of Six Flags a few years ago (hot, hot HOT and I had a touch of vertigo which made the rides a lot less pleasant), but I’m quite sure that I would love to go again. Soon. What sort of sadistic doctor schedules surgery in the summer any way????
Suzys last blog post..Independence Day 2008
THAT had me rolling on the floor laughing so hard I was wishing I could just be smited!
Straight Shooters last blog post..One World One Dream
I still think you earned the crown!
rrmamas last blog post..A preacher that blogs
Yeah… well… I once made my daughter (who had chicken pox) go to school because I wanted to go to lunch and get a pedicure with a friend who was only in town for one day… and I told my daugher-nah, I INSISTED that she just had a heat rash. All over her body. That was itchy.
Needless to say the school nurse called before my lunch date. Every party needs a party pooper.
June Cleavers last blog post..Did I Even HAVE A Great-Great-Grandma Cleaver?
Love the movie, and love the image I get of you on your knees belting that out to anyone who will listen.
Just remember, it is only one (or two) days in all the days of mommyhood. You will come through it fine – maybe not with all the grace you’d like, but certainly plenty of blogging material. And, isn’t that worth it after all????
Lanxis last blog post..1 more day to go
Hehehe… I LOVE that part of Bruce Almighty (love that movie) and totally see the relevance here.
Funny girl. Funny Spin.
I agree – batter up!
Ramblin’ Reds last blog post..My Call for Good Bedroom Music :wink, wink:
You’re a better mom than me…I don’t do Whitewater, just wait for the church youth group to take them in the summer. I’ll volunteer for most anything at church –but that!
Oh, and the fever? The chlorine killed all those germs, ya know??
Kathleens last blog post..love thursday
Mommy of the year award goes to you. I hate those places. I’m counting on Grandma and Grandpa to be fun. And, if I had dragged myself to a water amusement park, you would have bet I would have let my slightly sick child go in the water! God does seem to have a bit of a sense of humor though?!
If I lived closer, I would take your kids for you… or go with you…
i don’t like to get wet, but I enjoy the time that my kids are occupied with something so they don’t bug me..
Okay…it’s time for me to clarify things a smidge, as my sweet Soliloquy has ignored?, forgotten?, taken creative license?, obliterated? certain facts.
Raise your hand if you think I’ve never taken the kids to WW? That’s what I thought…all of you.
Sure, I was out of town all week, but it’s not like I haven’t taken the kids to WW before…not only was I her hero for doing so last summer, but I was literally a hero the last time I went to WW.
It was just Stink and me who went, and while we stopped swimming in the germ-ridden water for a bit of lunch (by the way…seriously, do any of you stay-at-home Moms keep your kids at home when they’re sick? I mean…sending them to school with the chicken pox?, are you kidding me?) some special needs kid fell off his picnic table and started having a seizure.
While the rest of the people in the area continued stuffing their faces with chilli dogs and processed cheese nachos, as if nothing was happening…Stink and I sprung into action to find medical help. We got him hooked up with First Aid, and then I needed to bring Stink back down to earth — that was a little too much drama for him.
So, I stepped up to the plate last summer and saved Soliloquy from WW…and did a little extra saving while I was there…for good measure.
Not that I’m against Soliloquy taking creative license…just wanted the FULL record of our WW history to be known…
Spin
That Spin is just too quick witted. UGH.
texasholly @ June Cleaver Nirvanas last blog post..Sitting on the sun in the presence of dinosaurs…
Oh, girl! I am sorry that the torture is just more drawn out now. That totally stinks! And — don’t tell anyone — but I would have taken my son to the waterpark, too. For the exact reason you mentioned — just to try and get it over with!
I would have and HAVE DONE exactly that. Although, I didn’t let the hubby off so easily….he HAD to come along! Yeah, I’m cruel like that!
I sent my son back to school after he threw up there. The nurse called, we picked him up. He came home in a great mood, played with toys and wanted to go outside. So we sent him back thinking he was playing too hard after lunch or hanging upside down on the bars. He puked again and I got severely reprimanded.
Melanie @ Mel, A Dramatic Mommys last blog post..Wordless Wednesday #10 Superheroes – Just Like Us
Oh, I so feel your pain.
My version of Spin has dragged me to the waterparks (yep that’s an s there, as in multiple parks) 3 times (more than once) this summer, overnight each time, once for 2 overnights in a row.
I hate it. He says, “It’s a vacation. The kids love it.” Indeed they do. However, I fail to find it a vacation when I have to pack, unpack, figure out meals, snacks, skip nap times (yes, Skip!), get kids to bed in beds they don’t like, and then come home to unpack and wash a big pile of laundry. Yeah.
And they kids do love it. They don’t understand why I seem so frustrated.
MamaMidwifes last blog post..GodTube.com
Can this GET any worse?? I ask you.*******
Oh honey….don’t you know you should NEVER ask that? haha!
Connie